You’re So Vain…You’ll Probably Think This Blog is About You

Once upon a time I was your prize.
Always thought of you whenever I closed my eyes.
You got left behind so don’t apologize.
You brought it on yourself, so don’t bother to cry.
Continuous lies. False alibis. Your demise.
You had to go too far like when you super-size your fries
And you got no appetite.
You think it’s funny, but who’s the last to laugh tonight.
You blinded me, I couldn’t see past the light.
Addicted, like fiends that pack the pipe.
Anniversaries came twice, but we’re only half as tight.
A relationship like ours was rare, like when a rapper writes
All their lyrics on their own and don’t have to bite.
We were closer than two sperm cells in the same nut.
You were my one and only, no one else could claim tutt.
The same slut, you were the first time I met you
Is back once again, and now I have to let you...go.
But before I do I’m gonna to let you know:
Keep your head up and don’t get fed up
When I get up and walk out the door.
You knew before, that this would happen eventually.
Maybe we were just meant to be
The best friends of the century.
Evidently, broken hearts never mend
So here comes the rain again
Falling on my head like a tragedy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A love so deep I was in
And thought I wasn’t.
Becausin', I ain’t be got no weapon,
I’m high-steppin out the door.
Now I’ve learned my lesson and furthermore,
If love didn’t live here anymore
You should have told me before.
Since you were Raw like Eddie Murphy,
I became Delirious and it hurts me
To know that things will never be the same.
You were a part of me like the blood in my vein.
Love hurts worse than the worsest migraine.
Oh Man! I couldn’t stand
The Method with which you Bring the Pain
To leave me gasping and suffering.
I grab an Aspirin and a Bufferin
And now I’m gladly stuffin ‘em into my oral cavity.
Even gravity wouldn’t have brought down my spirits so rapidly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wisdom above is my rhythm of love.
Forever steady happily,
Like four Eveready batteries
Supplying energy til the end of me,
The penalty of suicidal tendencies.
But my love is neverending
Even if our divorce is pending;
Even if my heart was still mending;
And your knee was still bending
From you begging for forgiveness.
Did I mention that I witnessed
Your attempt at slickness?
You and Loverboy eating delicious
Italian dishes followed by French kisses.
Thought it was mad vicious.
In the distance, three doves cry a lullaby.
I wonder why Infidelity
Come so regularly, available readily
When you sleeping with the enemy.
I’ll be on my way, merrily.
Don’t know why you testing me.
Cuz when push comes to shove,
You replying with shrugs
So I’m denying the hugs,
But don’t bug cuz I still got love

-tuttafucco signing off
(shout out to Agent HighToe, Majellin, Escobarrio, Millennium and the rest of the SizeOne Crew!!)